Subj: How to Donate Sperm
What if I told you that there was a way to make an extra $1500 a month without doing any work? What if I told you that it would take less than 4 hours each month, and you wouldn’t be doing anything more than what you already do at home for free?
Most likely you read the title of this article, so you already know that I’m talking about sperm donation.
All over the world, there are women looking to start families who are unable to for a variety of reasons, and you could get paid $1500/month for helping them.
Trust me when I say it is probably the easiest (and most enjoyable) way to make money that has ever existed.
Sperm donation has been around since 1884 when Professor William Pancoast of Philadelphia’s Jefferson Medical College performed an insemination on the wife of a sterile Quaker merchant.
The professor allowed a group of his medical students to vote on who amongst them was the best looking. The “winner” then provided a sample which was used to inseminate the woman.
What you might call the first technologically modern cases of artificial human insemination however took place in the 1950’s in Iowa.
“Iowa?” you may ask. Yes, Iowa.
While at first glance Iowa, USA might not seem the likely spot for the progression of sperm donation, artificial insemination had been practiced on livestock in that area for decades, and scientific research into the optimization of animal reproduction was, and still is, big business in that part of the world. So for those looking to help human couples conceive it was the perfect place to start.
Why donate sperm?
There are many different reasons a man might want to donate sperm. Some do it for the extra cash. Some do it because they enjoy helping other people. While others do it simply because they like jerking off and figure they might as well get paid for it. For most guys who decide to donate, it’s usually a combination of all those factors. A survey among sperm donors at Cryos International Sperm bank showed that altruistic and financial motives were the primary factors in a man’s decision to donate, but what is interesting is that in 2004 when the monetary compensation was increased by 100% it didn’t significantly impact the number of new donor applicants or the frequency of donations from existing donors. When compensation was then dropped in 2005 to its previous levels, there again was no effect.
And that’s just fine. It’s okay to masturbate, and if you can make some extra money doing it while also helping people in need, all the better. It’s certainly more fun than donating blood or bone marrow.
What Does Sperm Donation Entail?
Sperm donation is a fairly straightforward process once you get through all the paperwork.
You set up an appointment with a sperm bank to have your sperm tested. If your sample is up to their standards and there are no red flags in your genetic profile you’ll be invited to become a donor. After that you’ll visit the bank once or twice a week for the next few months to leave samples. (Depending on the bank you choose you could be paid as much as $200 for each sample you leave.)
Your anonymous profile (age, race, height, education level, interests, abilities, etc) will be put in a sperm donor database, and couples who like your profile can choose to use your donor sperm to help start families.
“Who gets my sperm?”
The people who use sperm donors can be broken up into three main categories.
- Infertile Couples
- Single Women
I don’t think I really need to go into detail on why the above three groups might need a sperm donor.
My History with Sperm Donation
I have applied for three different sperm donation clinics. At first it was mere curiosity that brought me to the sperm donation website. Sperm donation to me sounded like the punch-line to a joke. However the more I looked into it, the more it seemed like something I wanted to do. Not only would I get paid a relatively large amount of money for doing almost no work, but I would be helping people achieve their dreams of becoming parents where otherwise they would not be able to.
The first sperm bank I looked into was in Los Angeles back in 2012. I was preliminarily accepted after my first test donation and subsequent interview, however I ended up moving to Northern California before actually signing the contract, and so I was never able to donate.
My second experience was in 2015 when I again decided to become a donor. I went in for my preliminary sample donation and was rejected on the basis that my sperm did not meet their criteria (more on sperm criteria this later). At the time I was training for a Spartan Race and so I was spending a large amount of time running in hot, sweaty, compression shorts. (Heat and compression are not good for sperm.) Knowing that I naturally had a high sperm count from my tests at the previous sperm bank, I emailed my new bank explaining the possible reasons for my lowered count and asked for a retest. I went in two weeks later and provided a second sample which passed their requirements. I came back the third week and was given a third test (A tie breaker as they called it.) but for some reason my sample again did not meet their minimum lab requirements and I was sent packing.
Perhaps it was some macho desire to feel validated as a virile, potent man. Maybe it’s the fact that I’m extremely competitive, but I suddenly became very upset that I wasn’t accepted.
I found a third bank located near me. This time, determined to be accepted, I pulled out all the stops. I went on a spermatogenesis regimen. Zinc supplements, selenium, ice baths, ashwagandha. Increasing my fertility had become my new (albeit bizarre) obsession. And it worked. I went in and they immediately accepted my first sample.
I was invited to my second meeting, a brief interview and explanation of the sperm donation process as well as a second test sample.
In order to become a sperm donor, you need to meet some very stringent requirements. Some of these requirements you can improve, but some of the requirements are limited by your genetics. I hate to break it to you, but for some of you, sperm donation is not a possibility simply because of your genetics.
How to Become a Sperm Donor
Step 1: Apply
The first step towards becoming a sperm donor is to find a clinic near you. A simple Google search should turn up a couple options.
Pick one that suits you and look for the donor application on their websites. Sperm banks are regulated by the Food and Drug Administration (I wonder if sperm is considered a food or a drug?) so the online application will ask you the following questions:
(While I don’t recommend lying, I will give you the “correct” answers just for your edification.)
- How old are you? (You must be between 18 and 39 on average to be accepted.)
- Do you have a 4 year college degree, or are you currently pursuing one. (Must answer Yes.)
- How tall are you? (You can fudge this by an inch or so on the preliminary application, but eventually they’ll take your real height during a medical exam, so don’t fudge too much. If you are over 5’9 you should be fine, although some places allow men as short as 5’7 to donate.)
- What is your hair color? (All colors except for red are okay. Most sperm banks do not accept donors with red hair as there is a limited demand for it.)
- What is your eye color? (Any color is fine.)
- What is your mother’s/father’s ethnic heritage? (There is a demand for all ethnicities. You will also be asked if you have any Jewish, Québécois, or Cajun heritage as these populations are at an increased risk for Tay-Sachs disease and you will be tested for the carrier trait.)
- Have you or anyone in your family ever suffered from [Alzheimer’s, mental retardation, cancer, depression, suicide, OCD, Cystic fibrosis, Lou Gharig’s, MS, sickle cell, club foot, cleft palate, etc]? (Answer No.)
- Were either of your parents adopted? (Answer No.)
- Have you ever lived in or visited Europe for more than 12 months? (If you have, you are automatically disqualified due to your increased risk of having contracted Mad Cow disease.)
- Have you ever tested positive for [insert STD]? (I recommend getting tested before going in for your appointment. If they find an STD during their medical screening they’ll either make you wait six months before donating, or else they’ll permanently disqualify you.)
- Have you ever donated sperm or applied to donate sperm before? (Most banks limit the number of times a man can be a sperm donor.)
- Have you received any tattoos within the last 12 months? (Answer No.)
- Have you ever had sex with another man? (Answer No.)
- How many sexual partners have you had in the last 12 months? (The more people you’ve had sex with the greater the chance that you have or will get an STD.)
- How many sexual partners have you had in your lifetime? (Same as above.)
- Have you ever been in jail or prison for over 72 hours? (They don’t want criminals and being in prison increases your risk for disease.)
- Have you ever used illegal drugs/shared needles/smoked crack/etc. (Obviously you should answer “No” to this question.)
- Do you like jerking off in small uncomfortable rooms? (Answer Yes… Just kidding. They won’t ask that.)
Step 2: Attend a Preliminary Meeting
If you answered all the questions above “correctly” you should be invited in for a preliminary meeting at their offices, during which time you’ll be asked to leave a sperm sample for them to test.
They will ask that you abstain from ejaculating for between 3 and 4 days before the preliminary meeting so that you can provide an optimum sample.
During the preliminary meeting they will also ask you some medical questions about you and your family, as well as give you a brief overview of the donation process. The medical questions will be the same or similar to the questions you answered in the application.
They may also ask you about your reason for wanting to donate. I don’t know if this question is used to decide whether or not to accept you as a sperm donor or if it’s simply for their own internal records, but if I were you I would say something close to the following,
“Donating sperm seems like a great way to help people. I can make a big difference in someone’s life and really help them.”
You will be given a plastic cup and directed to a small room about the size of a doctor’s office in which you will be asked to… well… you know.
Inside the room there will be a place to sit, a sink, some sanitary napkins, and various pornographic material to assist you in your collection. Two of the banks I visited had DVDs and magazines to choose from, one of them only had magazines. Pray that you get a place with DVDs as handling those magazines was not a prospect I looked forward to.
After you are done they will freeze your sperm overnight, then thaw it and observe it under a microscope to see how well your sperm handle being frozen.
What They Look for in Sperm
The sperm bank wants to make sure your sperm will be able to effectively impregnate women after they freeze and then thaw them. To do this, the lab technicians will observe your sperm under a microscope and look for three primary attributes.
- Count – How many sperm per milliliter.
- Motility – How well does your sperm swim? Do you have Michael Phelps sperm or Gary Busey sperm?
- Morphology – Is your sperm healthy and sperm shaped, or is it sprouting extra heads?
While each lab has its own requirement, on average only about 1 in 5 men will have the necessary sperm characteristics (high count, normal morphology, good motility) to be accepted as donors. (I’ll show you later in the article how to improve your sperm to increase your chances of being accepted as a donor.)
Step 3: Attend a Medical Screening
At this point, after you’ve left your sample with the technician to test, you’ll receive an email or phone call within a couple days letting you know whether your sample met their standards.
If you are not accepted due to your sperm sample not meeting their requirements, they may let you retest.
If you were accepted, congratulations, you only have a few more weeks of paperwork, blood tests, urine samples, and family history charts to complete.
You’ll be invited back for a series of more thorough meetings in which they really go into detail.
You’ll be asked to provide your family history going back three generations. They’ll want to know the racial makeup, height, age, and health of all your family members.
If there are serious medical conditions which run in your family you will either be tested as a carrier for these traits or you’ll be rejected from donating.
How to Improve Your Sperm Sample
One of the primary factors in becoming a sperm donor is that your sperm are able to adequately impregnate a woman. This means that your sperm must be healthy.
And in order for your sperm to be healthy, YOU need to be healthy.
If you’re going to implement a “sperm improvement regimen” you should note that the process of spermatogenesis takes thirty days, meaning you will need to stick to your regimen for at least a month before you will see any noticeable results.
If you want to increase the motility, mobility, and count of your sperms here are some tips to follow:
Increase Your Testosterone – Men with low testosterone levels do not produce healthy sperm. Read How to Naturally Increase Testosterone and implement all its advice.
Supplement with Ashwagandha – Ashwagandha is my #1 supplement recommendation. Its positive effects are almost too good to believe. It’s one of the few natural supplements which have been scientifically shown to increase testosterone, improve sleep quality, and increase fertility.
Avoid Heat – Heat kills sperm. In fact an old Japanese method of birth control was for men to take hot baths before having sex. Don’t go to saunas. Don’t spend an extended amount of time in tight pants. Don’t wear compression shorts out in the heat. You get the idea.
Step 4: Sign the Contracts
After they’ve accepted you as a sperm donor they’ll ask you to create a profile about yourself to show prospective parents. They’ll ask you to include things such as your interests, taste in music, languages you speak, any special abilities or talents.
You’ll probably also be asked to bring in baby pictures of yourself so prospective parents can get an idea of what their baby will look like.
Once you’ve done all this, you’ll sign the contract with the sperm bank, officially making you a donor.
Legal Aspects of Sperm Donation
Becoming a sperm donor is a legal process. You sign multiple legal contracts which state the agreed upon terms, such as how often you will donate, how long you will donate for, how much you will get paid, whether you will release your identity to your offspring, etc.
Two aspects which I feel I should cover in this article are your parental rights (or lack thereof) and the release of your identity.
Firstly, you are not legally responsible for the children which are produced using your sperm. You have absolutely no parental rights. On the flip side, you are also no legally responsible for your offspring. You can’t be asked for child support or anything like that. There is absolutely no legal connection between you and any child conceived with your sperm.
But what happens 18 years down the road?
There are two ways you can donate: openly or anonymously.
In an open donation, once your offspring turn 18 you give them the sperm donation clinic the right to set up a one time meeting between you and your offspring.
Only about 1 out of every 3 children born through sperm donation actually decide to request one of these meetings. This is an opportunity for them to ask you any questions they may have about their family history or just a chance to meet their biological parent. This is also an opportunity for your to meet the person you helped give life to. This meeting isn’t required, and agreeing to an open donation does not give you to any legal rights or obligations. You’re simply giving permission for the sperm bank to set up a meeting should you both agree to it.
In an anonymous donation, neither you nor your offspring will have this option to potentially meet in the future.
Many potential parents want to give their child the option to meet their biological parent when they turn 18, so sperm banks will often incentivize donors by paying about twice as much per donation for choosing to donate openly.
If you have any other questions about the process, you can ask your local sperm bank.
Until next time,